3rd beta

1,281!!!!! There's definitely a baby growing in there. I have a sonogram appointment on February 16 to detect a heartbeat. At that appointment my RE will give me my "graduation" papers and I'll be released to my OBGYN. How can I make these next three weeks fly by? I'm finally a mommy to be!

2nd beta

it's 481!!! Almost tripled. I'm beyond happy and excited. Our third and final beta is scheduled for Friday. Please keep thinking positive thoughts!

Symptoms so far:
-Extremely tired
-Achy boobs

Beta in

161 beta today! Hoping it doubles on Wednesday...I'm pregnant!

Shocked, Speechless, and Scared!

My beta is scheduled for Wednesday, January 28th. This past friday I stopped by Target on my way home to pick up a few necessities. My sister called to see what I was up to and immediately asked if i was going to test soon. I told her that I probably wasn't because I was so sure that IUIs would not work with us. I was already looking ahead to IVF in the next few months. I thought about it and decided to pick up a box just in case I decided to test. I got home from Target and realized that I hadn't used the bathroom in more than 4 hours. Why not I thought. If it's negative then it could still be early. If it's positive I can tell my mom on her birthday tomorrow. I was 10DPO and used the first stick. I let the dogs back in from outside and went to grab the test to take upstairs with me as I jumped on the TTTC board. I looked down as I picked the test up and thought my eyes were playing tricks on me....two lines! Not a faint line, but a light pink first line. I called my husband shaking and told him the news. I called my sister and then my mom (so much for the surprise....I couldn't wait) I also have never felt more scared in my life. What if it was a faulty test? What if the next test I took came out negative? I tested again that night after holding my urine for 4 hours. Another positive! Today is 12 DPO and I have gotten a positive each day with the line getting slightly darker each day. I won't feel that this is real until my beta results come back. I'm calling the RE first thing in the morning to see if they can get me in sooner. I really hope this is our miracle cycle. Stick little poppy seed stick!

Symptoms:

More tired than usual but that's it so far. I wish I felt something more.

IVF Consult

We met with Dr. Khan about our consult today. It looks like we're going to head towards IVF if this last IUI doesn't do the trick. I actually feel peaceful since making this decision. Sure it's a crap load of money but it's going to give us a 50% chance of success each try. Our doctor is confident that we'll be accepted into Shared Risk which will give us 6 tries at a fixed fee. If we don't bring a baby home after six tries then we get 100% of the money back. We'll be doing ICSI which will take care of all of the steps towards pregnancy except implantation. I feel really positive about this. Hopefully we'll get the financial aspect together soon and be expecting a baby in a few months.

IUI #2-monitoring

Sperm meeting egg picture courtesy of http://mysticmiss.wordpress.com/2008/08/30/ivf-at-41-is-going-fab and brought to my attention from ghjunkie on the TTTC board.

I had my CD9 appointment today for IUI #2 and left pleasantly surprised!

It started off really shitty because they have a new nurse doing blood work. She looks at my arm where there are two very visible veins, feels around, and says that she can't feel the vein. I told her that I always get complimented on my veins (I'm quite proud of them thank you very much!) At this point I'm thinking that this is not going to go well. I've always hated needles but after getting my blood drawn 10 times in the last month I've sadly gotten accustomed to the pinch. I wasn't feeling easy about any part of this. As she's prepping me I'm trying to take deep breathes so that I don't have an anxiety attack. She puts the needle in as sloooooooooooowly as she possibly could. It hurt like hell. I feel sorry for all of those ladies that have hard to find veins.

I went in for my ultrasound and the tech said my lining looked nice and thick (thank you). She looked at my right ovary and didn't find anything over 10. At this point I was fearing the worse. I'm not responding to the drugs. Thankfully my left ovary gets the gold star! I have 2 follies sized 14 and 15 growing beautifully!! I have monitoring appointment #2 on Saturday. The doctor said that I will probably be ready for IUI 2 early next week....yay! I'm really excited about having 2 targets....go get em tiger!

Fresh start to the new year!

Wow....it's 2009 already. Not that I'm sad to see '08 go but what happened to those 12 months of my life? I guess it went to all of the endless hours of obsessing over ovulation sticks, temperatures, charts, injections, bloodwork, diagnostic exams, RE appointments, IUIs, ultrasounds, and clomid.....everything associated with our battle to get pregnant. Thank you baby rabies for making me insane!!

The new year equals a new start right? I'm going to try not to let trying to conceive encompass every aspect of my life. I want to focus on what we do have rather than what we don't. I'm going to say goodbye to the Bitter Betty, Negative Nancy, and Jealous Josie that I've become over the last 17 months of this journey. It's time for a change and it starts today.

News Years Resolutions:

1. To not to let baby rabies control my life.
2. To lose the 20 lbs I've gained since trying to conceive.
3. To let go of my anxiety and stress.
4. To have more fun!!!!

Happy New Year everyone!!